The Challenge of Changing Jobs

Dear Coach,

I don’t like my job and I feel like it’s literally making me ill. Can you help me? 

I’m a young, single woman who needs to support herself. I took my current job thinking that it would be temporary but it has lasted more than two years and I’m miserable. On Sunday afternoons I frequently get a headache in anticipation of returning to work on Monday. In today’s job market, I could probably find work elsewhere but, for some reason, I’m scared to death of quitting the job I have. I don’t want to be labeled a “quitter” and I don’t want to appear weak. I fear the financial implications and wonder if another position might be even worse. 

Any advice?

Signed,

Can’t Seem to Quit

Dear Can’t,

If quitting was easy for you, I’d be worried that you’re not pushing yourself through the tough times to achieve your potential but because quitting is hard, I’m confident that you’ve done all you can where you are and it’s time to move on.

For starters, let’s redefine the word quit. The Latin origin of quit is quietus which means “to set free.” Start your journey with affirming yourself by saying (out loud), “I will set myself free.” How does that feel? You may have to say it several times a day but it’s a step towards getting you on the right track. 

Quinton Skinner, in an article for Experience Life Magazine writes, “Quitting is hard, it’s scary, and it’s not always the answer. But sometimes it can be a constructive act that leads to greater personal growth and opportunity.” 

So why is quitting so difficult for some of us? Annie Duke, author of “Quit: The Power of Knowing When to Walk Away,” addresses this question. She writes, “We’ve sunk costs and resources into the situation we don’t want to lose.” She goes on to explain how we often feel an aversion to the possible regret of switching more keenly than the discomfort of the current circumstance. Usually, we wait too long to make the change. Sound familiar? 

Having a plan may help you move forward. Here are some suggestions: 

1. If possible, secure a new position before leaving your current job. 

2, Don’t tell your coworkers you’re leaving until you make it official.

3. Quit in person, giving your employer two weeks’ notice. 

4. Write a letter of resignation that includes your gratitude for the initial opportunity of working for the organization/person.

5. When you share your decision with your coworkers, don’t trash-talk the company or supervisor.

6. Just do it! Set a deadline, get your ducks in a row, then take the plunge.

As you assess your decision, ask yourself these questions: Do my current values still align with my past decision? What’s my motivation for quitting? Consider what you’ll gain, not just what you’ll lose.

However you decide to manage this aspect of your current life will be a learning experience for the future. Good luck on your journey.