The Amazon Jungle

As the holidays approach and island life begins to explore another winter season, a rapidly growing trend is circulating through our communities. It is a powerful presence bringing an ongoing frenzy to our very doorsteps.

In South America, the Amazon is a winding monster of a river. The massive headwaters gather and begin to flow from the heights of the Peruvian Andes and empty after 4,000 miles at the doorstep of the southern Atlantic Ocean. The Amazon is one of the longest rivers in the world. It is unstoppable and surrounded on many shores by dense tropical jungle. As the powerful Amazon moves with a steady determination, the life—wild or otherwise—that watches and depends on the river can become unpredictable and sometimes bitter when threatened with reality.

Electric eels are cruising along the tributaries of the Amazon and working in organized packs to achieve common goals. All along the Amazon, predators will cast lures to draw in unsuspecting victims. The Amazon has outposts at every twist and turn of the mighty watercourse. New discoveries are always waiting to help any troubled soul. Rare frogs with chemical secretions are waiting at Amazon marketplaces to cure all ills. Various contraptions invented by those living closest to Amazon will offer the fountain of youth in a box, much like the traveling snake oil man from a hundred and fifty years in the past. Life along the Amazon has not changed in a thousand years.

Meanwhile, back on the Collier County coastal islands, and at the beginning of the monster seasonal traffic, a different type of Amazon is flourishing with a very similar effect. The thoroughfares of Florida might not have electric eels working with common goals, but electric Amazon trucks are now circulating through communities and working in pacts to deliver an endless flow of ongoing commerce to our very doorsteps.

As with the unstoppable Amazon River, the life nearest the river—wild or otherwise—must hopefully thrive and survive, the incredible river of commerce that is seemingly never ending.

Once upon a time, in the not-so-distant past, a group of marketing experts were probably sitting around and wondering how to sell more products and increase the flowing river of commerce. After a few libations, the group might have understood that if a customer could shop while sipping a glass of wine or a cocktail, the lubrication process might enable any product to become much more appealing. When the smartphone became the partner and the catalog for shopping—while a potential customer was enjoying a little liquid inspiration—the massive force of another Amazon began to flow stronger and faster than ever before.

When a particular Marco Beach Boy and Girl became a married couple and set up house on Marco Island, the flowing force of the Amazon was only a distant consideration. In time, however, when the old landline fell to the wayside, along with long distance telephone bills, the little computers that we call “phones” became the new general stores for everything.

At first, the mighty flow of the Amazon trucks on the island was only a trickle. A stray package might drift up and settle onto the porch once or twice a month. This was when the Marco Beach Boy would come home from work and smile. The modern life was wonderful. When the Marco Beach Girl came home and found the waiting packages, she was happy. She could now shop without the hustle and bustle of stores and without having to drive and waste time.

After a few more of the busy winter seasons, the flow of the packages became stronger. The cardboard boxes became bigger and more numerous, and the trucks that were delivering the flow of the Amazon were becoming as numerous as electric eels on the Amazon River. Once again, the Marco Beach Boy smiled. Life in the 21st Century was indeed wonderful.

During the wet season, when the rainforest along the Amazon basin in Brazil begins to live up to its name, and day after day of accumulation begins to pour from the sky, the rush of the river becomes even more powerful. The same is true on Marco Island when the snowbirds land and settle in for another season. This is when a tidal wave of cardboard boxes begins to flow from the Amazon electric trucks.

The days of infrequent package arrivals are now in the distant past. The Amazon River of commerce has indeed become The Amazon Jungle with the quiet slither of electric trucks now delivering enough daily parcels to be shocking.

In the present day—and through every single hour of the night—the Amazon delivery vans are prowling every street. When the Beach Boys and Girls of Marco Island arrive at home, the cardboard boxes will be waiting. The boxes are big and small, light and heavy, and like an unstoppable river, which is always flowing, the deliveries keep coming.

After walking into a wall of boxes blocking the doorway and littering the fringes of the driveway with enough cardboard to daily fill a recycling bin, family members are finding clever ways to combat the dangerous flow of controversy. One family member might offer. “I didn’t order this!”

While another might claim, “Oh, I ordered this a month ago.”

“I cannot believe they sent this tiny little vial of lipstick in this giant box.”

“This box must be for someone else.”

“Did they pack this in China?”

When the Sears and Roebuck catalogs began to arrive in American mailboxes, the middleman in old general stores might not have seen the end coming, but in the present age, the massive flow of Amazon boxes might be around as long as the 4,000-mile river in South America.