Difficult People

This is a story found not only in the coastal islands of southwest Florida but also in a narrative that is common in almost every workplace. It is a story comprised of all the wonderful parts of humanity. The story is as old as the B.I.B.L.E. – as in the Book of Instructions Before you Leave Earth - and understanding the story is the key to the benefits.

Once upon a time on the beautiful white and sandy beaches of Marco Island, there were three Beach Boys. The Beach Boys were not really boys, as they were all grown men, but the behavior of the three men who were working on the busy beach during an especially busy spring break, was in retrospect, the type of behavior that could be found in any kindergarten. 

The three Beach Boys had a wonderful boss who happened to be a beautiful young woman. She was the Beach and Pool manager at a huge beachside resort where the hotel guests were paying extravagant amounts of money and expecting a smooth and seamless vacation.

Behind the scenes of the bustling beach and the very busy Beach Boys renting cabanas, chairs, umbrellas, sailboats, and stupid contraptions called water tricycles, the reality behind the scenes was far from seamless. As the pace of the business of the beach became even more hectic, the beautiful beach and pool manager began to realize that 80% of her time was babysitting her employees. The babysitting came into play when the overworked staff began to complain about each other. When one of the staff had had enough, that person would call off sick. When two or more would call off because of the hectic pace of the exhaustive days, the workload on the remainder of the staff was almost untenable. For those who came to work without a break, it became very easy to find fault with one another.

The busier the three Beach Boys became, the more they began to loathe one of their number. This is where the story really starts. The mountain folk of Appalachia call it the story of the three dogs. According to the old grannies who sit in rocking chairs and study everything from animal behavior to weather and matchmaking, the story of the three dogs is simple. If three dogs are together long enough, two of the dogs, will gang up and try to defeat the singled-out dog that is suddenly not included in the new pack of two.

As the story of the three Beach Boys continued through the stressful and very busy month of March, the beautiful manager began to lose her mind. At every opportunity, the three beach boys would complain about each other - mostly the two against the one - until finally the beach and pool manager scheduled a mandatory seminar after the spring break was over.

The seminar was supposedly for all the employees to learn how to deal with difficult hotel guests or customers of any kind, but the clever manager intended the upcoming class to be for her troublesome Beach Boys.

When the day of the class arrived, the manager smiled. The Beach Boys had no idea what was coming.

The first part of the daylong seminar dealt with the explanation that there really were not any difficult people anywhere. The problem with finding people difficult, or hard to deal with, was when there was a failure to understand where the “difficult person,” was ranking their personal values.

The next part of the class explained the typical four personality traits and that people with different personalities could find each other difficult to work with or serve as a customer.

The facilitator described the following scenario to prove his point:

Imagine an airport in a snowy city. The last flight is ready to depart when an announcement comes over the intercom and explains the upcoming flight is canceled because of the winter weather.

This scenario is where the four personality types emerge with perfect clarity.

Personality number one laughs and says, “Oh well, let’s go to the bar, have a drink, meet some new friends, and talk about what to do next.”

Personality number two becomes furious with the gatekeeper, storms the boarding station, and demands another flight to be ready at once!

Personality number three is the person who will immediately try to nurture the other stranded passengers. “Do you need help? How about a piece of gum? You can have my hotel for your kids; I will sleep in the airport.”

Personality number four will not comment to any of the other stranded passengers. This person will open their laptop or phone until an alternative mode of transportation is secure and under their control.

When the seminar was over the beautiful manager and the three Beach Boys understood why the little business group had so much trouble dealing with the difficulties of each other.

The ousted dog of the three dogs was the first personality type. This Beach Boy was the one who talked too much to the guests. It was his extrovert personality type to be the outgoing socialite who could not possibly resist any strangers.

The second and third personalities are the two dogs of the three against the one. These are the perfectionists and control types who must achieve perfection and control of all situations at all costs! These two could not stand watching the socialite socialize because it could not be perfect and it could not be under control—therefore it was wrong and infuriating!

The fourth personality type was the clever and beautiful manager. She was the nurturer who could not bear the constant complaining and only wanted to preserve the peace and help everyone deal with whoever was under the misconception of being difficult.

After the seminar, everyone lived happily ever after—almost.