Ask the Life Coach: Coaching Tips for Fear

Dear Coach, 

Like most older people in SW Florida, I’m fearful of what’s happening with the Coronavirus and how I might be or will be affected by the outbreak or the circumstances surrounding it. Can you give me some tips on how to alleviate my unfounded fears?  

Fearful in Florida 

Dear Fearful, 

Thanks for your timely question. Fear of Covid-19 is running rampant all over the world right now. Some fear and much caution are warranted, but excess or debilitating fear is not. Here are a few coaching tips on how to handle your fears: 

1. Stay informed but know when to step away. Whether you’re getting your news from newspapers, television, social media, or online, it’s important that you keep from being overwhelmed. Unlike some weather emergencies when it’s important to be continuously informed, this is not the case. Know how much is too much for you and act accordingly. 

1. Get yourself out of the way. Rather than fixating on your own needs and fears, consider what you can do to help others who may be more affected than you. Here are a few suggestions: Help keep our local food banks stocked by donating food, take a meal to someone who NEEDS to be in isolation (leave it on the doorstep if necessary), order gift cards or take-out from local restaurants who are in jeopardy, resist stockpiling food or paper goods so others will have what they need also.  

1. Take care of yourself. Get adequate sleep, eat healthy, exercise, enjoy the outdoors. Also, take care of yourself spiritually—especially if your place of worship is closed. Meditate, pray, remember that “fear not” is mentioned in the Bible 365 times for a reason. 

1. Acknowledge your fear. Just as it’s important to acknowledge a child’s fear and validate her feelings, afford yourself the same compassion. Put your fears in context and don’t let them keep you from living a healthy life.  

1. Make a plan. Consider what you’ll do if you can’t get to the store, plan for time alone (i.e. get your closets cleaned out or weed your garden), and plan for how to handle a health emergency (virus related or not). Having a plan will give you a better sense of control than buying more toilet paper will.  

1. Call a friend or family member if you’re feeling lonely or fearful. Stay connected the best way you can with friends and family. Emailing and texting may not be as satisfying as they once were. We all need to hear the voice of another who cares about us. This human connection will help calm your fears.  

1. Trust yourself and your capabilities to get through these difficult times. In my experience, people generally have a greater capacity to handle hardship than they think they do. Affirm your capabilities. However, if you are feeling severely depressed, anxious, or fearful, seek professional help. If you think a few minutes talking on the phone with a Certified Life Coach would be helpful, send me an email at askcoachmershon@gmail.com. 

Hope this helps!